The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Randomize
