yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
whose parrot is this?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
