spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
