Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
