I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
