ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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