It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
