You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
