Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
