Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
