i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
