I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Randomize