So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize