fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Thank you for not boning my boss.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
