Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
you had me at cake vodka
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
