hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
