my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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