But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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