and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
