I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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