69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
