You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
