...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I have post one night stand depression
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