i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
