we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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