After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
