I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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