Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
