things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
