HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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