Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
