I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
