i just google imaged poop.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
