yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
did i just pee glitter
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
