Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
