Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
is wine microwaveable?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
whose parrot is this?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
