He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
only you would photoshop your dick
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
BRING THE BAGELS
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
