Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
