he puts the penis in happiness.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize