Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
