was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize
