I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize