Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
