Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
