Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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