He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
