just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize