Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
