I don't remember. Are we still dating?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
