Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
